Every few months, it seems

I'm starting to think that these every few month postings is a new fad for me. I can make these work. But this time, instead of me complaining about something, I will be doing the complete opposite.

There are a few good aspects that need to be said. 

Hockey news: The Penguins beat Tampa tonight and took lead in the first round of Playoffs. If they keep steady, keep fighting to a minimum, then we'll be good and there just might be another Stanley Cup Championship in the near future!


Right then, onto more good news. Truth be told, I haven't been to concert since 2008. Sad, I know! BUT, that will all change tomorrow night. It will be a night that I have dreamt about for quite some time! This man is an ICON. His music is LEGENDARY. And ever since my mom bought me a Live from Madison Square Garden CD many years ago, I've become an even bigger fan. Yes, I am talking about... Sir Elton John!!


It's even hard to imagine that he is coming HERE, to my small hometown, to a venue that holds only 7,000 or less. It's a dream come true. The day that I got tickets was a nightmare, but I did score seats. They weren't great, but hey, we would be in the same room as him! Well, a few days ago, ticketmaster emailed me and said that the original tickets I had bought, were sold to us in error and that they were busy trying to find us new seats. Well it turns out, they UPGRADED our seats at no additional charge!! So we went from sitting at the way back of the arena, to being about four sections away from the stage! Eek!


It's hard to believe that in 24 hours, I will be on a cloud of exciting emotions, getting to see an extraordinary artist perform in my town.


Time to go plug in the camera battery and hope to find a memory card that is big enough to hold all of the pictures I plan on taking!




G'night world.


-Kim

All the right moves...

When I started this blog, I had every intention of keeping up with it. Well... that didn't work very well. I enjoy writing and everything, but when it comes to putting everything into a blog post, it just shoots out the window.

I read all of my old posts and realized something. Most of the posts are me bitching about things, or complaining. It really didn't seem like it when it was happening. Talk about being dull and boring. So onto something cheery and delightful.


A few of the girls and I have been talking about seeing a concert next year. Yes, next year. In June. Tickets are on sale in 10 days, for one of the most anticipated shows of the summer of 2011. Yes, that's right... the Backstreet Boys/ New Kids on the Block summer tour!! I have to get excited about this, seeing as I was one of the biggest BSB fans when I was like 10, never seen them in concert... and well, I've already seen NKOTB five times and met them three times. But the two groups together?? Hello, old school teeny-bopper Heaven right there!

The concert will be in Chicago, the worst city in the world. Okay, it's not the worst. But there are some crazy drivers there!!..but we've had awesome luck in Chicago, seeing as Allison, Celeste and I all got amazing face time with Donnie Wahlberg there two years ago :)


With that said, I am going to take this cheerful post and hit the road. Time for bed, as it's back to work tomorrow!




Aloha,

Kim

Missing Out

There are things in my life that I know I have missed out on. In my 23 years of life, I can honestly say I'm a bit disappointed in myself. 

In fact, it wasn't until this year that I took my very first airplane ride, just for a hockey game in Pittsburgh. Needless to say, I was scared to death. But, when we were flying over Lake Michigan/Chicago and I looked out and saw the Sear's Tower, I was amazed. It was such a cool sight to see.

But it's things like that and then other things that I wish I could do more of. There are so many places to go, things to see and do... and of course, people to meet. I'm sure everyone out there says that at some point of their life, but then there is the ensemble of people that get to do that every day.

There are some people that get to mooch off of mommy and daddy's money and get to go on trips halfway around the world. There are people that have awesome paying jobs and get to take killer vacations. That isn't me, though. Unfortunately. I have a job, but the pay sucks. I like my job, not love, but like it enough to stay... regardless of pay. It's one of the lowest paying places for this line of work (working with individuals with developmental disabilities).

So, naturally, not having a great paying job has its disadvantages. Especially when it comes to bills, and once those are done, most of the paycheck is gone. Sometimes I wish I could have become a movie star or singer. Acting, I could handle. But I can't sing to save my life :)


As for traveling, I live in the Midwest. And when you're from the Midwest, you don't see much excitement. To get to excitement, you have to travel. Sometimes farther than others. So, as for me, I've gotten the Midwest covered, and most of the East Coast. Never been to New England (NY, CT, VT, etc...). I have southern roots, so I would love to go to Texas, Alabama, Oklahoma. There are so many places. I've always wanted to go to Oregon and a close neighbor to them, British Columbia.


I've never taken pictures of Mountains, or gotten to go on a really cool hike. I've never laid on a large rock in the middle of the desert, looking at the stars. I want to go on a really big boat, not necessarily a cruise ship, but still big enough. I want to see whales and dolphins... and maybe even sharks. I want to sit on a double decker bus and take pictures of Big Ben, the London Eye and the Tower on London. And then proceed to tour the Tower of London. I want to visit the concentration camps where distant ancestors were held and tortured, to remember them. And maybe, just maybe, I would like to visit Chernobyl. Maybe. And then I would like to take a stroll through a Japanese zen garden, walk past rows of cherry blossom trees and admire the beauty of Japanese culture.


It's things like this that I wish I could do. And hopefully some day I will. Since everyone will tell me, "Oh, you're still young! You have plenty of time to do this still!" I'm still jealous of everyone that has done this already.

A New Years Eve tale....

This was just a little somethin' somethin' I wrote on another blog. From New Years Eve 2008.

My friend was babysitting a little girl at a house that was only a few short blocks from me. It was New Years Eve so my friend was all like, "oh yeah, you can come over. It'll be cool."

Well, I get to the house and I realized something about that house from when I was younger. When I was in elementary school, an Asian family had lived there. There were at least four or five members of the family. Well one day, in the news, one of the family members snapped, broke in through a front window and shot everyone in the house and then took his own life.

So, I'm walking up to this house and flashes of the yellow police tape and the broken windows are going through my mind. Once in the house things seem to be going okay. My friend had told me that the little girl hated sleeping in her room, so I was all, that's weird. So we tried putting her asleep in her mom's room. Well, the baby monitors were on, and while we were reading a story to the girl, a noise went through the baby monitor that sounded either like a loud cough or someone clearing their throat. O_O My friend and I looked at each other and went on reading the story. Well, a few short moments later, it happened AGAIN. So me trying to be brave, I went down to the girls room, which was pitch black and then clicked on the light. Nothing.

I can't shake the noise from my mind, even over a year later. Hopefully the first and last time I will be in a house where a family was murdered. No wonder the little girl doesn't like sleeping in her room, since little kids are more aware of the "paranormal" if that's how you want to put it.

This moment still scares me and it's added to my handful of "weird" experiences, for sure.

Sometimes it's just good to get things out.

When I was younger, I thought I had the best life ever. I had a great group of friends, a wonderful family and plenty of pets to keep myself occupied. I thought I was living someone's life straight from the movies, you know, the ones that had the happily ever afters. For as long as I can remember, I thought that was how all people lived. But now I'm 23, and I'm starting to think some of that life was a lie.

Six years ago, my father was kicked out of the house. He admitted to my mother that he has cheated on her, not only with one girl, but multiple women. The fairy tale life I had always envisioned just crashed in front of my eyes. The late night yelling, the countless number of nights hearing my mother crying. I couldn't figure it out when I was younger, but when my mom dropped the bomb and said she was kicking dad out, it made perfect sense. Little did I know that this very reason would someone come creeping back into my life six years later.

So that was the beginning. In October of 2005, mom filed for divorce from the man that she still somehow loved, but had hurt her the most. It wasn't until 2009 that the divorce was finalized in April. In those years, we still kept in touch with dad, seeing as he only moved a few short blocks away. And still, he kept up with the stupid acts. Girlfriend after girlfriend... and all of them seem to get younger in age, minus -C-. **Won't be using names** At least -C- was closer to dad's age and was at least more presentable than the others. The "others" that I speak of were close to mine and my sister's ages. And were either strippers or drug dealers. Yep, real winners, if you ask me.

But unfortunately, none of them matched the winner that dad has found himself this time. It's "the real deal" he says, and claims he really feels something with her and even asked her to marry him. Oh, okay dad, what can you tell us about her? "Oh, she's 27 and she dances. Lives in Holmen and works at apac". Oh, did you say 27? Yeah, he certainly did. Well, my sister and I being the overly angry people with news like this, we go on facebook and burst into rants about how this is ridiculous. Well, little did I know, this is indeed a small world. A friend from high school knows this girl... and even claims that this new girl, can't be more than 21!! That's right 21.

So, me being the technology freak that I am, went into investigative mode and tried searching for this girl on facebook. No luck. With the info that I got from my friend -B-, dad's girl -S- is what I'll call her, is a very dirty and ghetto person. So I thought, where do dirty, ghetto people go on the internet? MySpace. :-D
Well that was the gold mine, I found -S's- sister which then linked a picture to her profile. Oh, and wouldn't you know, she really IS 21 years old. Very baby faced, too. Well, I printed off a picture of her and with the help of my sister, got up the courage to confront my dad. Now, in no way am I a confrontational person. I don't like doing it and I don't like getting/taking it. In a way, I'm like my dad because of that, but it needed to be done.

Longer story short, I told him about the age, showed him the picture, etc etc... the next day or so, dad texts my sister and says he lied about her age, because we would keep pressing on about her, blah blah. Which also means he lied to one of his sisters, as well. I was pissed, so bad that I was shaking. My sister, too. She called the sister he lied to, and I called our mom. Needless to say, I broke down on the phone, like hardcore. So bad that my mom left work early that day, even with me telling her that she really didn't need to. Was she afraid of what my sister and I would do, or wouldn't do? Pretty much.

So, here we were, faced with this situation that was now "our problem" as dad worded it, and that we should "just get over it". Get over it? How can we get over the fact that we are going to have a 21 year old step-mother, that strips, smokes and hangs with shady people? I mean, she is YOUNGER THAN ME and I'm his youngest child. A certain phone call to my dad one day got everything out in the open. Through tears and swear words, I told him how I felt and how wrong this situation was. The fact that he can't see that this girl is using him for all he's got, which isn't much.

*sigh*

I am so emotionally scarred right now. From the moment I found out what my dad did to my mother, I bottled everything up and still do sometimes. I used to be more lively than what I am. Now, I have this shy exterior. I blame everything in my past for that. I hate having to go through daily life thinking of what will come next. Going to work and having to pretend everything is okay, laughing when I don't really feel like laughing. Sure, I love getting away from the drama for a few hours, but even surrounding myself with good people doesn't make things better. It helps, though. Not to mention my trust issues. I only have a handful of people I trust and confide in these days. I hate getting close to people for fear of this same thing happening to me. I hate the fact that I have liked guys in the past but always found it too difficult to want to further things, even more so now. No person should have to suffer through things I've gone through.


In the end, my father has lied to his family multiple times over the last few weeks, refuses to tell us anything about the girl (even though we're good at finding things out ourselves.) And this is why he didn't get a "happy father's day" greeting from anyone.

Selfish-ness

The title says it all, in my opinion. It's one of those things where you either are or aren't. In my case, I'm quite the selfish person, I admit it. Most people will deny the fact. But props to the people who indeed to admit it.

We often times just think about ourselves, only want to talk about ourselves (problems, situations, lives, etc...). in other cases, we wish we could have something that more than likely will never be ours. For example, people have this thing in their minds that think they can get with their favorite actor/actress/singer/comedian and so on and so forth. Well, some people do get to be that lucky.

But then there are the people who still think that, and then find out their favorite person already has a boyfriend or girlfriend, or are even married. So what happens then? That person suddenly puts on their "all about me" mode and start devising plans on ways for that person to break up with their partner and hopefully take that person's place. Why? Because that person is selfish and wants everything to go their way, even if that 'way' is crazy and will never happen.

It's kind of like when you strike a match and then light a candle. First the flame is small, but then it grows. Even sometimes getting out of control and starting an even bigger fire, then you're S.O.L.

But you know, some people are just 'destined' to be the one chosen by someone famous. Sure, they're lucky, but it shouldn't be the end of the world... and it shouldn't come to the point of trying to find ways of making those people break up. Selfish. As with any relationship, it may or may not work. Just because they've been together for over a year, or whatever it is, doesn't mean they are soul mates.


As for me, I'm trying to work on the selfishness. It's not a major problem in my life, but it does pop up at times. It's under control... my flame is under control :)

Happy reading.

~Kim~

Don't close the book on me.... you're beautiful.

There is something in life that bothers me about some people. There are a few billion people in the world that have things called FLAWS. Okay, make that everyone. We all have them, it's something we deal with daily. Some more often than others, but they are there. Some may bite their nails constantly, some may swear every other word, others might just have some kind of bodily function that just doesn't work properly.

But you know what? Who cares? I'm one of those people who can see past flaws in others and won't judge them because of it. I won't not  introduce myself to someone if they are biting their nails. Yeah, biting nails is gross, but hey, people do it. We live with it.

Then there are the people out there who think they are too good for everyone else. The people who think they are perfect, want nothing but perfection and won't settle for anything else. The kind of people who WILL judge other people and be all, "Ew, gross". Well, hate to burst their bubbles, but those people SUCK. They are probably the people who, at the end of the day, think things are going great, but in reality it's not.

People have flaws. It's life. Some people can change or work on their flaws, but in the end they will still have a flaw. And we should still love those people. Take my mother for example... she was raised Southern style. So with some of the words she says, she adds the letter 'R'. For example: WaRsh, which would be 'wash' to the rest of us. We laugh and have a good time with it, but she can't help it. Just like a person who is lactose intolerant... they can't help it when things shift and well, you get my drift. You gotta go, you gotta go is what I always say.

I take my leave now and will step off of my soap box for now. Until I find something else to rant about or something that I must talk about. There is something, but this is going on long enough.

Peace.




~Kim